Burps & Good Behavior

Riding home tonight, Jake burped. The conversation went like this:

J: "I burp!"
M: "Say excuse me."
J: "Mommy burped!"
M: "No, I didn't burp."
J: "Yeah!"
M: "No, I didn't. You did."
J: (Burp -- "catches" it in hand) "Here Mommy, it for you!"

Gee, wonder where he learned that...(Poppy)

We went to Kohl's tonight. I told him if he behaved, we would go to "Old McDonald's" for dinner.

J: "No! I no want to have!" (pronounced hayv)
M: "Jake. Can you have good listening ears?"
J: "Yeah!"
M: "Can you be respectful?"
J: "Yeah!"
M: "Can you have good manners?"
J:: "Yeah!"
M: "Then you can behave. That's all it is."
J: "Nooooo!"

Luckily, he had good listening ears, respect and good manners so he got to go to McDonald's. But according to Jake, he is not a have!